Posts Tagged ‘L’

Gallery: Lord Smeagle

Friday, May 16th, 2014

Name: Lord Smeagle
Location: Mount Doom

Lord Smeagle is a meankitty

Is there anything in its pocketses it's not sharing with me? Tuna treats? Shrew ears? Or string!

What makes Lord Smeagle so mean?

Hello, My name is Lord Smeagle. I come from Mount Doom, Middle Earth – also known as London, England.

When I’m not bullying my precious little sister Dame Bombadill I am embarrassing my owner by coughing up furballs in her new neighbour’s house and scratching kindly kiddies.

Oh well, it’s all in a day’s work of being a truly mean kitty. *evil cackle*

Submitted by: Catherine

Share

Gallery: Lucky

Wednesday, May 14th, 2014

Name: Lucky
Location: Unknown

Lucky is a meankitty

The old "some human tried to burn me" scam....I learned it at my mother's knee! Now I'm livin' large and mean.

What makes Lucky so mean?

Lucky is mean because someone put him in a trash bin and tried to burn him up. It was a 100* + day 2 years ago when we heard his faint cry for “HELP”. We nursed him back to health, but he will slap you real hard if you try to touch him. He also bites and hisses if you touch his feet, with no mercy at all. But we love this mean kitty. We feel LUCKY that we found him!

Submitted by: Anon

Share

Gallery: Leela

Saturday, March 29th, 2014

Name: Leela
Location: Florida

Leela is a meankitty

Does this look like the face of a kitty who'd do all those naughty things? Yeah? OK FINE!

What makes Leela so mean?

Leela is the latest kitty addition to our household. My husband snatched her from underneath the building where he works wjere several feral cats were living. Needless to say, not one of them was fixed. Leela was one of the litters that was birthed in April 2000.

Leela had an eye infection, and one eye was sort of shut, so we had to take her to the vet before we could bring her home. We didn’t have a name for her, but since we love “futurama”, we named our temporarily one eyed cat “Leela” after the show’s one eyed alien ship captain.

Anyway, Leela is *the* meankitty of the Royal household. She can sometimes be good, but most of the time she is very, very bad.

Some of Leela’s likes:

-toilet paper (she loves to grab it and run down the hallway, as it streams behind her)

-paper towels (she jumps on the kitchen counter and pulls them down; see toilet paper, above)

-jumping on the dining room table and leaving little litter particles everywhere. yum!

-jumping on mommy and in the bathroom sink while mom does her makeup and hair

-standing below the ice dispenser on the fridge, watching and waiting for falling objects

-her rhino beanie baby, which she plays fetch with

-any kind of fabric that hangs down, ex. curtains, sewing fabric, tablecloths, dishtowels

-running around on the top of the comforter, chasing after feet and hands, just as her mom and dad are trying to freaking sleep….

Leela is a meankitty

If you'd get out of the way, I've got some poopy litter between my paw pads I need to distribute on the table...

She can really be a little beast sometimes, because she’s got so much energy, and she’s so defiant. but we love her. I particularly love when she jumps on me right out of the shower…she rests her head on my shoulder and purrs, like she’s giving me a kitty hug *sigh*. Too bad she can’t be that way all the time!

Submitted by: Tricia Royal

Meankitty’s Note: Leela was one of the VERY FIRST KITTIES to ever be in Meankitty’s Gallery. YAY LEELA!

Share

Gallery: Loxley

Monday, January 13th, 2014

Name: Loxley
Location: Perth, W. Australia

Loxley is about to fong.

Stop or I'll fong you! Real bad, too.

What makes Loxley so mean?

This is Loxley, named after Robin of Loxley (Robin Hood). He’s 2 years old and weighs in at 9kg (almost 20 lbs!), and he’s a big softy.

Loxley in the act

This is me fonging you.

But then there’s the times he wants what we call “a fonging”– to wrestle, bite, claw, rake, chew, gnaw on us. With that weight behind him, he packs a serious punch.

Photo submitted by: Andrew

Loxley is mean.

I am worn out from all the fonging.

Share

Gallery: Lars

Sunday, August 25th, 2013

Name: Lars
Location: Bremerton, WA

Lars the Meankitty

What do you think I am, a freakin’ poster kitty?

What makes Lars so mean?

Yes, he does look like a bobcat, doesn’t he? Main Coons are supposed to be part lynx. Lars is the Old Cat. He’s big. He’s sweet. He drools. All he wants is love.

When he was younger, he was known as King Lars. The self-appointed Guardian of the Sidewalks. A frightened child, a squeaking puppy, a cornered cat — and Lars would levitate across yard, fence and leg to put the hurt on their antagonist. He mistook the happy friendliness of a border collie when the dog’s mere size made a little pup squeal in fear. Lars treed — TREED — the dog up his owner. The dog trampled about on his master’s shoulders while Lars patrolled like a Yard Nazi around the man’s feet. I had to rescue them both.

Another time, a neighbor was babysitting a big dog that meant no harm and just wanted to play. But the dog got too near one of Lars’s cats. The little cat spat, and Lars heard it. Not only did the neighbor have to run through the yard into the alley with the terrified dog — but Lars took a shortcut to head them off. If I hadn’t stopped Lars, they’d still be screaming down the alley.

Lars the Meankitty

I’ll show them for making me pose…I’ll chew up the book!

Lars has gotten old and very crippled. He walks like a turtle, hunch-backed, a sore step at a time. Poor old man.

But do not –repeat– DO NOT attempt to pick him up or help him when his back is bothering him. The only teeth he has left are his fangs, and they’re nearly an inch long. He can — and HAS — sent a helpful person to the emergency room. With a hand swollen up like a football.

Pet him. Praise him. Just don’t pick him up.

Got it?

Photos submitted by: Donna B.

Share

Gallery: Tulaf

Monday, April 22nd, 2013

Name: Tulaf
Location: Crouching in the bathroom

Tulaf is a meankitty

What they don’t know is I pee on the other bathmats, too, it just doesn’t show stains, heh heh heh

What makes Laf so mean?

This evil feline is named ‘Laf (short for Tulaf — don’t ask). He has his own theme song to strut to. Why is he so mean? Let me list several of his less charming qualities:

1. He’s a fighter, not a lover. When someone tries to give him some much-needed loving, he growls.
2. He DEMANDS fresh, cool water from the sink. The stream must flow at the just the right speed and temperature, or he sneezes and wipes his paws all over the mirror in disdain.
3. Occasionally, he likes to pee on the fluffy white bathmats just to assert his evil dominance.
4. ‘Laf gets very excited about his vittles, sometimes a little too excited. When he over-stuffs his fat face, he will puke by the trashcan.
5. He licks himself, in dog-like fashion, in front of his human slaves. This is just WRONG!

But, like many bullies, he’s really a softie underneath the rogue exterior — he sucks on a leopard-print pillow when he thinks no one’s looking.

Submitted by: Kerry

Share

Gallery: Lady

Friday, March 8th, 2013

Name: Lady
Location: North Carolina

Lady the Meankitty

If you won't scratch that spot on my back, I'll do it myself.

What makes Lady so mean?

Here’s Lady, my meankitty. She’s the smartest cat I’ve ever known, and I know she’s always plotting devious things when I’m not looking. She loves to chew on plastic bags and she can get into almost anything. I had to put childproof locks on my cabinets because she was getting into the cleaning supplies!

She’s very talkative, especially when she sees a bird out the window, but she doesn’t meow like a normal cat, she chirps and gurgles. Her more mentally-challenged brother, Tuffy, is the sweetest orange fluff ever, so because of that she gets really jealous if we pay attention to him. She’ll butt in and chase him off our laps and then decide she’s tired of us and go eat.

Lady the Meankitty

I swear, you're utterly useless. I'm reporting you to the SOHC.

If you pick her up, beware! She hates any confined space, and our old vet had a Caution note on her file because she was so hard to handle. When she jumps up on our bed to step all over us, she points her paws down so it hurts (she has no front claws so she has to get creative). She’s a smart, mean kitty but we love her…

Photo submitted by: Heather

Share

Gallery: Lebron

Monday, February 11th, 2013

Name: Lebron
Location: Tucson, AZ

Lebron is a meankitty

And you wonder why I want to go outside…

What makes Lebron so mean?

Lebron is for sure a mean kitty. He is an inside-outside kitty. We have mixed feelings about this, but we desided to do this with him since he has a flair for peeing on our futon sofa. No matter how much time he is out, though, he comes inside to pee on the futon. We have to keep a plastic protector under the cover! LOL!

Lebron likes to pee

Gonna spell “Urophobia”–something I do not have–and take triple word score!

He also loves to perch on the table while my mother and I play scrabble. He waits until he has a chance, and he scoops up a scrabble tile for himself. He is a little stinker!

Also, he likes to pee in the bathroom sink. This morning, he did so when I was not looking, and then he “buried” it with the clean clothing I just put on the counter in preparation for getting ready for work. Evil!

Could you PLEASE put those nice warm clothes beside the sink so I can hide my scent from predators? Is that too much to ask?

Could you PLEASE put those nice warm clothes beside the sink so I can hide my scent from predators? Is that too much to ask?

He is a lovely, affectionate cat, but he cries and cries when he wants attention until he is payed his due. He is a true mean kitty!!!

Submitted by: Suzanne

Share

Gallery: Leo and Sammie

Sunday, December 23rd, 2012

Name: Leo (tabby) and Sammie (black)
Location: Georgia

Leo and Sammie are meankitties.

Quick...let's share the cat tree peacefully for a minute so it ruins the picture she's trying to take for Meankitty!

What makes Leo and Sammie so mean?

From rescue cats to cat-divas! Leo and Sammie don’t like each other one bit and fight over who gets to be the “top cat” on the cat condo. Sammie in particular has had a rough life. He is a tripod and thinks he can use that to his advantage. He loves to bite my head and ears and bat at my nose at 4am because HE WANTS TO EAT. When they get the “midnight crazies” there is no stopping them. And at Christmas time, guess who tries to eat the little decorative tree? Leo! And of course he does it in the middle of the night.

Leo and Sammie are meankitties

Humans are so judgy! Artificial trees TASTE better as an after-midnight snack.

Submitted by: Rachel Kall (author at http://www.rachelkall.com/)

Share

Gallery: Lilith

Monday, July 9th, 2012

Name: Lilith
Location: Greenville, NC

Lilith is a meankitty

To be honest, I shredded the dog for grins, not to protect the humans.

What makes Lilith so mean?

This mean kitty is named Lilith and she is the Queen of the house. She likes to sharpen her claws on the sofa arms and the leather recliner. Her favorite pastime is making biscuits on the soft bellies of her human subjects. While this sounds very sweet, she like to use her claws and leave marks to show us who’s the boss.

She protects us as well as ruling with an iron paw. She once shredded the nose of an overly curious dog that ran into her kingdom. No door is ever closed to this regent and no mousy toy is safe.

Submitted by: Deborah

Share