Posts Tagged ‘L’

Gallery: Loki (2)

Friday, January 29th, 2016

Name: Loki (2)
Location: Adso’s house

Loki is a meankitten

Cattitude--I've got it in spades! Um. What are spades, anyway?

Why is Loki so mean?

Hi!! My name is Loki and I am so happy to meet you. My story of how I got here is kind of fun, or so says Karrin, my new slave.

See, there have been rumours going around with the animals near where I used to be, that if you crossed the busy zoom concrete, there was a human who would fall in love with you and take you home. I thought, “WOW! I am cute and little, bet I could win that lotto!!” So one day I braved the zoom and went into the big dark place with all the zoomers (slave here, that’s cars to us). Ok slave, go away I got this…so anyways – I wandered about and saw lots of humans but I knew they weren’t the magickal one, so I stayed away. I knew who I was looking for, and sorry 2 legs, you ain’t it.

Then………there she was! She had a ‘SUCKER’ tattoo only animals and kids selling cookies can see. I called to her – very quietly so no one else heard. I saw her turn around and look!! It WAS her, OMGs!!! It’s TRUE! Only she could hear me! I watched her look all OVER then turn back around and say, “Did you hear that?!”

The other human (not a magickal one, just one of those ordinary ones) said, “It was a mockingbird.”

Loki is a meankitten

Do I look like a mockingbird to you? I EAT mockingbirds for lunch. Um. what are mockingbirds?

I decided to be a bit more aggressive in getting her attention. I meowed a wee louder and decided to show myself, wandering between two zoomers. She heard me, looked in disbelief (it was funny, that look), and ran over going, “OOOO! Look at YOU! How cute are YOU! Oh crap, Jeff is gonna kill me!!” I let her pick me up and I threw in some purrs and biscuit-making to show how adorable I was. She cuddled me and took me inside to her office. There she played with me and everyone came to see my handsome self.

Her boss said, “I think you like animals more than people.”

“Well DUH,” I thought. “Look at ME, look at YOU – no contest! Pfft, please.”

Loki is sleeping

All I had to do was break out the belly of cute and the humans were goners!

Then then then (this is the BEST part), she took me to this GINORMOUS castle!! She fed me and showed me around and I met these 3 IG’s: Tor, Reno and Grayson, whom I promptly made my subjects with some hiss and swipe and awesome kitty ninja moves (HEEYAH!). Tor (he’s a GIANT!) cowered and looked sad, so I let him be my friend. I met this Jeff person whom I ensnared with my cuteness, since I’d heard Karrin say, “If Jeff doesn’t like you what will I do with you?” Please – no prob, I mean LOOK at me! Yeah say it – awwwww!!! That’s right.

Then I met the famous Adso, who was the inspiration for the tale of the magick human. WOW! My hero! He told me it was all true and I had just inherited the kingdom, like he did and Adair after him (I like Adair, she cuddles with me). And that all of us – the 3 Ruling Class (what? We ARE!) and our subjects: the 3 IG’s, and a Bearded Dragon named Shinki – heard the tale passed around far and wide and found our forever home. Adso says I have to learn SOHC rules and I am not quite sure what those are, but they sound FUN!

So watch out world. I am Loki, the IBTK (itty bitty Trouble kitty), with ninja moves and I WILL be a meankitty to fear (after my food and a nap).

Photos submitted by: Karrin

Gallery: Lyle

Friday, October 30th, 2015
Name: Lyle
Location: Unknown

Lyle the Meankitty

I only fetch when there's tuna in it for me.

What makes Lyle so mean?

This is really mean Lyle. He’s a biter, kicker, clawer, and he fetches. All crinkle balls must die!

Photo submitted by: Rebecca

Gallery: Loki

Friday, November 7th, 2014

Name: Loki
Location: Unknown

Loki is a meankitty

Luggage Theft Defense Device, Feline style

What makes Loki so mean?

We named our kitten “Loki” after the Norse god of mischief, fun, and tricks. Loki has certainly lived up to his name because anything that moves is fair game for his version of tricks!

In this first picture he has purposefully packed himself into my daughter’s luggage to await unsuspecting passersby.

Loki has lots of toes

They keep hiding my treats...but I'm getting better at finding them!

In the second picture he is getting a fix on a concealed hand inside the blue sweatshirt. He is gentle with his claws—good thing as there are 22 of them since he is polydactyl on all 4 feet—but what he lacks in meanness claw-wise, he more than makes up for it by using his teeth on everyone and everything!

Photo submitted by: Gail

Gallery: Layla

Wednesday, October 29th, 2014

Name: Layla
Location: Unknown

Layla is a meankitty

He's pulling my tail! He's pulling my tail!

What makes Layla so mean?

My name is Layla. My human Mark found me at his work place when I was 5 weeks old. I am now 8 months old. I put on a nice act and followed him to his car so he would take me home. Once I was in for a couple of weeks, I showed him my meankitty streak. I have proceeded to tear up his blinds and the corners of his carpet.


Psycho kitty mood swing in 3.....2.....1.....

As soon as my humans wake up, the first thing they should do is feed me. If they do not feed me, I will cry for hours and stand in their faces. If my servants are eating, I will do whatever it takes to get their food. It should all be mine! Except, I do not want them to pet me. When they try, I bite and scratch and demonstrate why they should touch not tthe cat. There are also times where I want nothing more than to be attached to them at all times. I do love my humans, but they need to respect my mood swings.

Photo submitted by: Mark

Gallery: Lord Smeagle

Friday, May 16th, 2014

Name: Lord Smeagle
Location: Mount Doom

Lord Smeagle is a meankitty

Is there anything in its pocketses it's not sharing with me? Tuna treats? Shrew ears? Or string!

What makes Lord Smeagle so mean?

Hello, My name is Lord Smeagle. I come from Mount Doom, Middle Earth – also known as London, England.

When I’m not bullying my precious little sister Dame Bombadill I am embarrassing my owner by coughing up furballs in her new neighbour’s house and scratching kindly kiddies.

Oh well, it’s all in a day’s work of being a truly mean kitty. *evil cackle*

Submitted by: Catherine

Gallery: Lucky

Wednesday, May 14th, 2014

Name: Lucky
Location: Unknown

Lucky is a meankitty

The old "some human tried to burn me" scam....I learned it at my mother's knee! Now I'm livin' large and mean.

What makes Lucky so mean?

Lucky is mean because someone put him in a trash bin and tried to burn him up. It was a 100* + day 2 years ago when we heard his faint cry for “HELP”. We nursed him back to health, but he will slap you real hard if you try to touch him. He also bites and hisses if you touch his feet, with no mercy at all. But we love this mean kitty. We feel LUCKY that we found him!

Submitted by: Anon

Gallery: Leela

Saturday, March 29th, 2014

Name: Leela
Location: Florida

Leela is a meankitty

Does this look like the face of a kitty who'd do all those naughty things? Yeah? OK FINE!

What makes Leela so mean?

Leela is the latest kitty addition to our household. My husband snatched her from underneath the building where he works wjere several feral cats were living. Needless to say, not one of them was fixed. Leela was one of the litters that was birthed in April 2000.

Leela had an eye infection, and one eye was sort of shut, so we had to take her to the vet before we could bring her home. We didn’t have a name for her, but since we love “futurama”, we named our temporarily one eyed cat “Leela” after the show’s one eyed alien ship captain.

Anyway, Leela is *the* meankitty of the Royal household. She can sometimes be good, but most of the time she is very, very bad.

Some of Leela’s likes:

-toilet paper (she loves to grab it and run down the hallway, as it streams behind her)

-paper towels (she jumps on the kitchen counter and pulls them down; see toilet paper, above)

-jumping on the dining room table and leaving little litter particles everywhere. yum!

-jumping on mommy and in the bathroom sink while mom does her makeup and hair

-standing below the ice dispenser on the fridge, watching and waiting for falling objects

-her rhino beanie baby, which she plays fetch with

-any kind of fabric that hangs down, ex. curtains, sewing fabric, tablecloths, dishtowels

-running around on the top of the comforter, chasing after feet and hands, just as her mom and dad are trying to freaking sleep….

Leela is a meankitty

If you'd get out of the way, I've got some poopy litter between my paw pads I need to distribute on the table...

She can really be a little beast sometimes, because she’s got so much energy, and she’s so defiant. but we love her. I particularly love when she jumps on me right out of the shower…she rests her head on my shoulder and purrs, like she’s giving me a kitty hug *sigh*. Too bad she can’t be that way all the time!

Submitted by: Tricia Royal

Meankitty’s Note: Leela was one of the VERY FIRST KITTIES to ever be in Meankitty’s Gallery. YAY LEELA!

Gallery: Loxley

Monday, January 13th, 2014

Name: Loxley
Location: Perth, W. Australia

Loxley is about to fong.

Stop or I'll fong you! Real bad, too.

What makes Loxley so mean?

This is Loxley, named after Robin of Loxley (Robin Hood). He’s 2 years old and weighs in at 9kg (almost 20 lbs!), and he’s a big softy.

Loxley in the act

This is me fonging you.

But then there’s the times he wants what we call “a fonging”– to wrestle, bite, claw, rake, chew, gnaw on us. With that weight behind him, he packs a serious punch.

Photo submitted by: Andrew

Loxley is mean.

I am worn out from all the fonging.

Gallery: Lars

Sunday, August 25th, 2013

Name: Lars
Location: Bremerton, WA

Lars the Meankitty

What do you think I am, a freakin’ poster kitty?

What makes Lars so mean?

Yes, he does look like a bobcat, doesn’t he? Main Coons are supposed to be part lynx. Lars is the Old Cat. He’s big. He’s sweet. He drools. All he wants is love.

When he was younger, he was known as King Lars. The self-appointed Guardian of the Sidewalks. A frightened child, a squeaking puppy, a cornered cat — and Lars would levitate across yard, fence and leg to put the hurt on their antagonist. He mistook the happy friendliness of a border collie when the dog’s mere size made a little pup squeal in fear. Lars treed — TREED — the dog up his owner. The dog trampled about on his master’s shoulders while Lars patrolled like a Yard Nazi around the man’s feet. I had to rescue them both.

Another time, a neighbor was babysitting a big dog that meant no harm and just wanted to play. But the dog got too near one of Lars’s cats. The little cat spat, and Lars heard it. Not only did the neighbor have to run through the yard into the alley with the terrified dog — but Lars took a shortcut to head them off. If I hadn’t stopped Lars, they’d still be screaming down the alley.

Lars the Meankitty

I’ll show them for making me pose…I’ll chew up the book!

Lars has gotten old and very crippled. He walks like a turtle, hunch-backed, a sore step at a time. Poor old man.

But do not –repeat– DO NOT attempt to pick him up or help him when his back is bothering him. The only teeth he has left are his fangs, and they’re nearly an inch long. He can — and HAS — sent a helpful person to the emergency room. With a hand swollen up like a football.

Pet him. Praise him. Just don’t pick him up.

Got it?

Photos submitted by: Donna B.

Gallery: Tulaf

Monday, April 22nd, 2013

Name: Tulaf
Location: Crouching in the bathroom

Tulaf is a meankitty

What they don’t know is I pee on the other bathmats, too, it just doesn’t show stains, heh heh heh

What makes Laf so mean?

This evil feline is named ‘Laf (short for Tulaf — don’t ask). He has his own theme song to strut to. Why is he so mean? Let me list several of his less charming qualities:

1. He’s a fighter, not a lover. When someone tries to give him some much-needed loving, he growls.
2. He DEMANDS fresh, cool water from the sink. The stream must flow at the just the right speed and temperature, or he sneezes and wipes his paws all over the mirror in disdain.
3. Occasionally, he likes to pee on the fluffy white bathmats just to assert his evil dominance.
4. ‘Laf gets very excited about his vittles, sometimes a little too excited. When he over-stuffs his fat face, he will puke by the trashcan.
5. He licks himself, in dog-like fashion, in front of his human slaves. This is just WRONG!

But, like many bullies, he’s really a softie underneath the rogue exterior — he sucks on a leopard-print pillow when he thinks no one’s looking.

Submitted by: Kerry