Posts Tagged ‘E’
Friday, August 1st, 2014
Location: the closet
I like to get in the closet and shed on my human slave's carefully dry-cleaned clothing, too. You should try it, it's fun!
What makes Edloe so mean?
Edloe is a 10 year-old grumpy glutton of a cat, having gone from a standoffish and aloof wallflower to a possessive and grouchy blob of fur and attitude since her natural mother passed on a few years back.
She now spends her few waking hours bossing around the other three cats and the two humans she owns. Once any of her rivals goes outside for a walk, she plops herself by the back door to growl and swat at them if they try to come back inside. She also bosses the others around the moment when fresh food is placed in the bowls.
The moment my wife heads off to the kitchen or bathroom during a movie, she comes back to find Edloe’s stolen her spot in the big comfy chair and refuses to give up space. The same goes for the couch…the value of any spot is measured by how much somebody else wants it.
Prime real-estate is the bed. If any other cat wants to be the bedcat, she either drives them away from the bed or rattles the blinds to annoy the humans into letting her have her way. Once she’s in place as bedcat, she shoves the humans aside to maximize her sprawl-space.
Photo submitted by: LS
Tuesday, January 14th, 2014
Feed me and I'll let you think I tolerate you.
What makes Elvis so mean?
This is Elvis. He is the meanest cat in the whole world. None of my friends will look after him when I go away as he attacks them. He pretends to be all nice and rubs up against them, then his eyes glaze over and he goes for the kill. He loves me, though.
Photo submitted by: John Stroud
Tuesday, January 7th, 2014
Location: Austin, TX
I prefer to be called "Most Magnificent Silky One", but do they comply? No. So I'll drown my sorrows in this chicken soup.
What makes Elmo so mean?
This is Elmo. We brought this fluffy kitty home from the shelter nine years ago. I will never forget this event and its lasting affect upon my psyche. Elmo is not a good name for a female, hence her hatred for those in this world. Her mother calls her Princess Puffalump; I call her Elmo Bin Laden. One of her hobbies is to scratch my eyelids and nose when I dare to fall asleep.
Elmo likes to be mean in a personal way. She always makes eye contact with me before inserting her teeth into my arm. She has deposited hairballs in my shoes countless times. Even our 80 pound Labrador trembles in her presence. I believe she may be one of the signs of the Apocalypse.
Photo submitted by: Mike
Sunday, September 22nd, 2013
Location: NO KIDDING
I'm yawning, yes, but maybe food will fall into my mouth if I hold it open!
What makes Eek so mean?
Eek tips the scales at 32 pounds (although he is very agile) so he doesn’t really need to be mean he cuts quite an imposing figure even if he is just yawning…yes he is yawning not begging for food in this picture!
Photo submitted by: Buck
Thursday, September 5th, 2013
Put 'em up, put 'em up!
What makes Emerson so mean?
My cat Emerson is so mean that I call him the “Light Weight Champion”. I even have a photo to prove it. Check it out and be sure to put on your boxing gloves!
Also, Emerson always tripped my former roommate in the morning when she was half asleep and trying to get ready for work. No broken bones but a lot of kitty giggles.
Submitted by: Amanda
Sunday, April 7th, 2013
Name: Blossom and Emily
Location: Barnsley, UK
Hey, Em, where you wanna go poo next?
What makes Emily and Blossom so mean?
I have another cat, Salem, and Emily and Blossom spend hours beating him up so he sleeps in the garden to avoid them. If he comes into the house and snoozes in a chair, whack, kitty claw across his head and another one biting his tail. Poor Salem just hisses and runs through the catflap so fast that he nearly takes it with him.
Emily is the ginger/white one, Blossom is white with brown and grey-black patches. They were litter trained when we got them but seem to be going through a rebellious phrase of hiding behind the cooker or fridge and leaving an unpleasant message. When they started going behind the sofa, where I keep my handbag, is when I had the most trouble. of view from visitors or burglars. Here I am, ready to go out to an important Town Hall meeting where I attend with councillors to discuss educational matters, my best suit on instead of my scraggy Levis, and I picked up my handbag to find a very diarrheic brown splodge all over the inside. Yes, one of the little monsters had crawled inside the handbag and left me a message I would not forget in a hurry.
If I could flip a bird with this claw…
I happened three times since, so now I leave my new handbag on top of a very high shelf. So now they favor my shoes, basketfuls of ironing, and the sofa itself.
Submitted by: Sandra
Thursday, December 20th, 2012
You cannot hear this over the internet but I am screaming RIGHT NOW! Without moving my lips. It is a high level SOHC skill.
What makes Elle so mean?
Elle was born right here in our house. The second her mouth and lungs were clear, she started screaming. For the first few months of her life, she screamed almost all the time. Anybody who’s ever had a screamer kitty knows that this can drive a slave out of his or her skull in no time.
Elle, of course, loved the fact that every slave in the house bowed and scraped before her in an attempt to please her. We offered the choicest kitty food, the best treats, fresh water (free of dog drool, even) and the greatest toys. Elle screamed anyway.
Then, for a while, Elle stopped. We enjoyed those brief weeks of silence.
But that did not last long. Elle was once again discontent with the universe and rarely lets us forget it!
Talking about things that make me want to scream… I hate Christmas carols!
And when Elle isn’t screaming her lungs out, she’s keeping the dogs and other cats in their proper places: beneath her paws. She beats up puppies. She beats up the other cats. She even beats up human ankles and shins when she’s in a foul mood.
Submitted by: Sarah
Wednesday, March 28th, 2012
Location: Israel, Earth
Clap, clap, clap your hands, everybody get up and dance!
What makes EZ so mean?
She is a gray alien, and an angry one. I have no other words to describe her.
Photo submitted by: Ido
Tuesday, March 27th, 2012
Names: Ex and Lilah
The dead cat trick works every time! Try it, SOHC friends!
What makes Ex and Lilah so mean?
Ex is mean, mean, mean. Especially if we expand the definition of “mean” to include “stinky” and “bizarre”. He loves to carry empty toilet paper rolls around the apartment, tearing them to tiny bits while howling when the mood strikes him. He also enjoys pulling rug pads out from under rugs and tearing them to bits too. He’s been working on one in particular for over ten years.
Hey, I want to chew up a rug pad with my big, blurry teeth!
He continues to collect small totems, like milk jug caps, plastic hanger protectors and the aforementioned rug pad bits to put in the people’s bed as a surprise. He likes hiding inside the comforter cover, which he knows makes the lady think he is dead and therefore freaks her out. His meanest trick is the oldie-but-goodie of peeing five inches away from the litter box. Every time.
Is that you, Kansas? Did I get the job?
The brains behind the operation, though, is his little sis Lilah, who really can be mean in the traditional sense, especially when you have petted, brushed or, oh, looked at her for a little too long. During the summer, she likes to meanly catch and hold cicadas in her mouth, thus achieving the elusive and very mean double cat-bug hum-growl-purr noise. Her picture shows her studying hard to find a way to achieve dominion over Kansas, as she is very bright and ambitious.
Submitted by: Chezna & Kyle
Monday, March 26th, 2012
Location: Decatur, GA
Dog's nose? Scratching post? Me decide!
What makes Emory so mean?
Emory is a recently rescued, supposedly “wweet” little kitty who was but a mere 11 ounces when we first met a few short weeks ago. Well, at first she hid behind the “sweet kitty” guise, so we’d fall in love with her no matter what she did.
Well, it worked! I won’t even go into details about the deep wounds she’s inflicted upon the ankles of anyone who gets near her, or about the ringworm that she gave about 29 men, women, small children, and other pets. She loves to attack the dogs…yep, doesn’t matter if it’s a pit bull or a chihuahua.
Here’s Emory flying towards the snout of one of our dogs. He’s ready to take it like a “man”, and despite Emory’s vicious plan of action, he continues to be mellow and kind to her.
Well, I must go put some more ointment on my ringworm rash. Thanks for the chance to get posted on your site! Emory would thank you, but she’s busy sharpening her claws at the moment.
Submitted by: Lisa