Posts Tagged ‘Cats’

Gallery: Beast (the)

Tuesday, March 28th, 2017

Name: The Beast
Location: Unknown

Beast is mean

This is practice for when I go after YOUR private parts...

What makes the Beast so mean?

He is so nasty he actually bit the private parts of another cat, who required stitches! Mean, mean, mean!

Photo submitted by: Susan R.

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Gallery: Spooky (2)

Saturday, March 25th, 2017

Name: Spooky (2)
Location: Denver, CO

Spooky is mean

I'm a miracle, all right. A miracle of MEAN!

What makes Spooky so mean?

Spooky is a mean kitty because from the moment I rescued him from the shelter, he has been a scratcher and a biter! Sometimes in play, but mostly not.

Spooky

This is my Really Spooky Spooky face.

He still gets water bottle squirts all the time for his actions. He often reaches out and grabs/bites an ankle or bare foot (ouch!) for no apparent reason. He gets easily stirred up when I am just trying to be nice and pet him and give him what I call ‘Kitty Massage’, which he will let me do for about 2.5 minutes and the the teeth and claws come out and it is rough play time (again, ouch!)

Spooky in tub

I dare you to turn on the water and see how I punish you for it.

He refuses to use the scratching post but does use the cardboard floor scratchers with cat nip in them. The back of my old couch is all shredded. I spray a special spray there to discourage scratching, I put up double sided sticky tape, too, all to no avail. I just gave up.

He needs more play time than I have the energy for, as I have arthritis and chronic pain and part of his crankiness is that he is an ‘indoor only’ cat. There are mean humans who want to hurt black cats, plus there are dogs all around where we live who would chase him up a nearby tree in a heartbeat. There is also a big scary parking lot nearby.

Spooky and toe

Am I in the mood for a snack? I'm not too hungry. Not overstuffed though. Eh, I could eat! Toe time!

Spooky is about three years old, and is a ‘miracle kitty’. He had survived a broken pelvis after being hit by a car before I had gotten him from the shelter and had only been out of the isolation cage at the shelter for about a month before I got to adopt him. The kitty doctor says that he will probably have arthritis down there as he ages.

Spooky

Are you talking to me? Because I'm not listening.

He has been a wonderful companion since the loss of my beloved 17 year old Miss Puss about two years ago. I really do love him a lot, and I think he loves me too, even though he is truly a MEAN KITTY at heart.

Photo submitted by: Steve

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Gallery: Ghost

Thursday, March 16th, 2017

Name: Ghost
Location: Chapin, SC

Ghost

No, I said turn RIGHT. Sheesh.

What makes Ghost so mean?

Whatever nanochip in feline brains that determines meankitties starts ’em young. Ghost is only 5 months old and I have had him since 10 weeks. In the shop, he was the kitten everyone wanted: house trained, playful, vocal, friendly…

And then we got him home. When he wants to play or be petted, he’s wonderful. However, if you don’t want to play when Ghost says it’s playtime, or if you want a purring kitty in your lap and Ghosty says no way… well… I have scars already. Where I once had a room covered in art and magazine clippings, pictures of bands, interesting advertisements (held up by over 1200 thumbtacks, YIKES!), most of it, where he can reach, has been torn down or ripped.

The worst is at night. I’d come home from a night out with friends and fall into bed about 4 AM. My leg would be curled up on the bed. One time when I woke, I’d apparently thrown my foot off the side of the bed, and it was bleeding. Guess why? He also likes to bite my hands if they are coming out from under the pillow and will eat my cellphone while I’m on it. The antenna is totally mangled.

Photo submitted by: MacKenzie

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Gallery: Pumpkin

Wednesday, March 15th, 2017

Name: Pumpkin
Location: NC

Pumpkin

Garfield is a wuss.

What makes Pumpkin so mean?

Pumpkin is like Garfield’s evil twin. She is so fat that she can barely clean her own dingleberries off her fur and rarely gives the fur she can reach a good bath. She’s rather greasy.

She likes to get up in her feeding slave’s face and meow obnoxiously until fed. Her human (aka feeding slave and pooper scooper) has to feign sleep in order to avoid Pumpkin’s bad feline breath in her face at 6 am. If Pumpkin is not served on time or does not like the food put in her bowl, she will get revenge by pooping on the floor.

Pumpkin also has a hissing problem, terrible cat food breath, and a habit of swatting at people. She occasionally tries to bite. Her human tried to help her with her weight and self-esteem issues by putting her on an expensive kitty diet, but Pumpkin gained all the lost weight back as soon as the food was changed back to the regular stuff.

Another one of Pumpkin’s hobbies is leaving behind clumps of fur all over the drapes, chairs, and bedding. She has her human slave well-trained to serve her demanding whims.

Pumpkin lives with Twinkie.

Photo submitted by: Sandi

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Gallery: Twinkie

Wednesday, March 15th, 2017

Name: Twinkie
Location: NC

Twinkie

Actually I've been practicing to audition for Kitty Prison Break.

What makes Twinkie so mean?

Twinkie looks really sweet and while she lives with Pumpkin (aka Garfield’s evil twin), she doesn’t have Pumpkin’s bad habits such as pooping in retribution; she has even more insidious foul habits.

Twinkie eats cords. She constantly disconnects the phone, eats through cable wires, and causes much havoc and consternation at the computer desk. She is a menace. This tiny, eight pound cat can stuff herself into the tiniest of spaces to work her evil deeds. Apparently, she is so starved from Pumpkin eating all of her food, that she must rely on the high fiber of coaxial cable and electrical wiring to maintain her energy.

We suspect she is also protesting her feeding slave’s computer chat addiction.

Photo submitted by: Sandi

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Gallery: Mr. Evil

Tuesday, March 14th, 2017

Name: Mr. Evil
Location: The Woods of the Evil Dead

Mr Evil

A mighty hunter with his many trophies.

What makes Mr. Evil so mean?

Be careful what you wish for. I wanted a cat that was tough enough to survive the coyotes in the woods behind our house, so it made perfect sense to take one home that was already living in the woods. The result is Mr. Evil. The person who’d been feeding him gave me a sob story about how he was a really nice cat but his current owner was cruel. She had even seen the man shoot the cat with a pellet gun!

I am here to say, I can guarantee you he was acting in self-defense.

Mr. Evil

A mighty hunter prepares to fish out some new trophies. Oh, and see the thing on the wall behind me? Totally mine. Jackolope.

I let Mr. Evil out within hours of getting him home–he scared me. My neighbor asked what his name was and when I told her Mr. Evil, she immediately answered back, “That’s a good name for him.” Another neighbor said, “You know, if you got rid of Mr. Evil, it wouldn’t bother me at all”.

Hunting is the E-cat’s one true love, but he also enjoys causing pain. That is what likely lead to the pellet gun thing. When he isn’t eating squirrels (literally) he likes to torture shrews or birds and chew the tails off of lizards.

Photo submitted by: Bruce & Laura

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Gallery: Booboo

Monday, March 13th, 2017

Name: Booboo
Location: Unknown

Booboo

They call me Booboo because I am always giving them bloody scratches and other booboos!

What makes Booboo so mean?

I’ve had Booboo since she was about 4 or 5 weeks old and she has always been the meanest cat I’ve ever seen. She’s 7 years old and a whopping 7lbs, but that doesn’t stop her from keeping the other 2 cats in our house in their place. She doesn’t like to be petted. She uses the bathroom floor as a litter box as often as she uses the box. She hisses, she scratches, she growls and she bites. And yet, I still love her.

Photo submitted by: Jennifer

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Gallery: Boo (3)

Monday, March 13th, 2017

Name: Boo (3)
Location: Washington State

Boo

When you take away my mosaic tile floors, I'm forced to find other places to hide my poo.

What makes Boo so mean?

Boo is the most evil thing ever to inhabit five and a half pounds of orange cat flesh.

If only I had known. I would have gotten a plant instead. I found a helpless little ball of orange fluff in a parking lot in Dallas in 1988. I took it in and fell in love with it, hiding it in my crappy ghetto apartment, avoiding the pet deposit on that roach motel. All these years later, Boo is a screaming, pissing, door-knocking at all hours, seventeen year old Bitch Royale De Luxe Orange Pussy: a special breed, of which there can be only one.

You see, she is the cat equivalent of the devil.

She practices blood curdling shrieking techniques and howls mournfully and bangs the bedroom door at regular intervals throughout the night. She cannot be let in, without whizzing a puddle in the corner; therefore, she cannot be let in. She sleeps all day, gathering strength for the night’s campaign of terror. She’s sleeping on top of the monitor as I type this, looking innocent and cute, thinking mayhem and human sleep deprivation.

Boo

Evil Boo and compatriot contemplate wire cutting techniques.

We had to purchase a large dog kennel for her to stay in when she has a particularly crabby moment, or day. She once took the other cat’s favorite toy, a fluffy piece of bunny fur, and placed it in the center of a fresh pile of pooh she had conveniently deposited in the mosaic doorway of our bedroom floor. She had been hoping Ray’s huge lumberjack boots would squish the pooh into the crevices of the tile mosaic, thus nailing both humans and the sweet black kitty in the same act of war.

She is the reason we have wood floors now. She is the reason there is an ugly dog kennel in my living room. She is the reason we take turns sleeping on the couch so that she will have some company and not feel completely ostracized from the family, though it only makes her slightly less of a bitch, and is only really effective if I do it. She is the reason I’ve spent thousands of dollars on veterinary care and kitty products. She’s the reason I’m going to buy some($&^@ kitty Prozac this month. We are going back to the vet to demand some chemical relief for her suffering and ours. It will probably cost as much as a car payment.

She probably hears voices in her head–“Meow. Mrrrrrooowwww! Never let the humans sleep! Meow! Meow! Poop on Everything! Meow! Meowwwwwww!!!”

Photo submitted by: Sandra

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Gallery: Boo (2)

Monday, March 13th, 2017

Name: Boo (Hiss!)
Location: Unknown

Boo Hiss

I hate kittens. Never had 'em, never wanted 'em. Why should I pretend to like them when their presence just means less attention for me?

What makes Boo so mean?

This is Boo. She can be very mean. When I introduced the kittens (Isis & Osiris) to her, she hissed for months! She would sniff my hand and if she detected “kitten” she would hiss at my hand & show me all her fangs! That’s how she got her nickname “Fangella”!

Photo submitted by: Deb

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Gallery: Boo

Monday, March 13th, 2017

Name: Boo
Location: Haunted House

Boo

I don't want to kill you, just rough you up a little. You've been bad.

What makes Boo so mean?

He attacks for no reason. He looks at you and you realize he will kill you if he can. Look out!

Photo submitted by: Tim

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