Posts Tagged ‘Cats’

Gallery: T (Ms. not Mr.)

Tuesday, July 29th, 2014

Name: T
Location: Philly

T is a meankitty

Actually I quit peeing on the rugs, walls and radiators when those jerks were no longer around to blame it on.

What makes T so mean?

T doesn’t pee on the rugs, walls, radiators and, occasionally, me – that was the two boys who now live outside. She doesn’t lurk in the closet to leap out on the other cat and any misplaced humans who might want to go from their bedroom to the bathroom. Instead, she howls at night from the top of the stairs hoping we’ll encourage her to run past the closet door in which the *other* cat (my partner’s) might be lurking.

She doesn’t drink from our water glasses, nor does she attack human toes – see “cat, other” above

She does flinch and run when my partner tries to pick her up, which happens eleventy times a day because my partner forgets T is not to be picked up – and also bounces down the stairs, jumps around and is generally scary. [Meankitty's note: I am unsure if Cheryl is referencing T or her partner with the stair bouncing and general scariness. Probably T but it's more amusing to think it's her partner.] T isn’t being mean; we suspect she has an abuse history before she adopted me.

T’s primary claim to meankittiness is this: she has learned the one paw from the official mean kitty. And she uses it … continuously … when we’re in bed … sleeping … or otherwise occupied.

Photo submitted by: Cheryl

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Gallery: Wahoo

Monday, July 28th, 2014

Name: Wahoo
Location: Unknown

Wahoo is a meankitty

Where to bite...where to bite...so many prominent human features that need to be scaled down to cat size!

What makes Wahoo so mean?

We found Wahoo when he was approximately 8 weeks old on a walk. It was early morning and still dark outside. We heard him cry and he came running up to my boyfriend Randy. He followed us as we walked around a track and when we were done, it started to rain and we felt it was destiny that brought him to us.

In reality it was some family that couldn’t care for him and dumped him in the park.

Anyway, Wahoo can bark like a dog and play hide and seek. He is a terrific pouncer and can rip anyone a new (you know what) in a millisecond. He loves Randy but has a problem with me. I find it hard to set boundaries and I end up laughing when he attacks me. He is a gorgeous cat with a horrible disposition.

Photo submitted by: Anne

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Gallery: Una

Sunday, July 27th, 2014

Name: Una Noel Shabooboo
Location: CO

Una and Dog

Meeeeeeee and my shadow! Whom I like to beat.

What makes Una so mean?

We have a couple cats that certainly fit the Meankitty bill. However, one of them rises like curdle cream to the surface. Our beloved Una Noel Shabooboo showed up at our farm on Christmas eve several years ago. I took her in and found her a home. The home was in fact a rabid cesspool of familial dysfunction.

Una and Books

My yoga instructor calls this one Melted Cat, No Bull

So I brought her home to live with our 20 pound Buddha cat, Grendel (the name does not begin to describe his laid back zen attitude – he truly is a hairy little buddha). She proceeded to beat the crap out of him. Did I mention she only weighed 2 pounds?

I am the crazy cat lady with the invisible homeless cat magnet. Over the years we have had numerous kittens show up on our doorsteps. While the kittens are still young (under 1 year of age), Una dotes on them. Once they hit a year, she begins a merciless program of beatings and torment. It’s really quite horrifying to behold. She even drove one cat out of the house to be consumed by a great horned owl (sad story… let’s not go into details).

Una the Meankitty

Actually I'm not sensitive to static electricity, I just think humans smell funny and don't want them rubbing on my beauteous fur.

She absolutely refuses to be touched unless you’ve just stepped out of the shower. We’ve determined that she is highly sensitive to static electricity and the only time you don’t shock her is when you are wet. We live in the high desert of SW Colorado so that don’t happen too often. She wants nothing to do with human contact and also routinely kicks the dogs’ butts. Even the horses don’t mess with her. She is tiny with these hideously white claws that gleam out of her velvety black paws. And she gives no warning. She can be sleeping peacefully and you simply walk by and her obsidian claws of death wreak havoc upon your defenseless flesh.

Photo submitted by: Krista and Flint

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Gallery: Cairo

Saturday, July 26th, 2014

Name: Cairo
Location: Not Egypt (Australia)

Cairo the Meankitty

I hate it when they let my food dish go empty...I get desperate enough to eat anything!

What makes Cairo so mean?

Cairo my gorgeous, 7 year old fluffmonkey will eat just about anything. He has been known to chew on 10c coins, tin foil, and snarkle into the odd pizza, raw cabbage and carrot, any type of meat or cream by-product, and of course, human hair. He’s fat and greedy, and while he makes a sublime pillow, sometimes he can get a little rowdy.

The pictures are him attacking and subduing an evil, strawberry chuppachup candy lollie, and trying to suck the sugar out of the wrapper. Oh, he’s mean.

Cairo’s nickname is ChickenCat, so named because I obtained him when he was so young, he hadn’t learned to meow properly. He ended up learning to make noises and meow from the chickens I had living next door to me. So now he sort of warbles and clucks like a chicken. He also beeps.

Cairo the Meankitty

I pray they feed me soon or I'm going to have to eat human flesh.

Cairo takes great pleasure in beating up his brother Fox, and I will send you photos of their fights later!

Photo submitted by: Jennifer

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Gallery: Baallow

Friday, July 25th, 2014

Name: Baallow
Location: Dunno

Baallow the Meankitty

I shall chew off the head and leave it on your pillow as a surprise!

What makes Baallow so mean?

Baallow is pure evil. She stands on top of the bookshelf next to my bedroom door and jumps, hissing and spitting, at people entering my room. She also hides under furniture and attacks peoples’ ankles when they least expect it. She will only drink milk while sitting on top of the refrigerator with me holding up the bowl until her majesty has had her fill.

Baallow loves to watch movies and, frighteningly, her favorite things to watch are the Hannibal movies. Whenever Anthony Hopkins comes on screen, she stares intently at it, and when he begins to talk she begins to purr and knead the surface she is sitting on.

Baallow the Meankitty

You look like fava beans to me, dog....

We call her HanniBaallow because of her vicious destruction of all the neighborhood small animals. I spend most mornings scraping pigeon entrails off the porch. She also brings live bats into the house without injuring them and releases them under my bed so that whenever I’m looking for something I get hit in the face with giant flying rodents.

She has bullied our dog within an inch of his life and often pushes him off his favorite mat just to annoy him. His bones, which he spends so much time burying, are tools in her breaking of his already weak spirit. She digs them up when he isn’t around and re-buries them somewhere else. The poor thing almost has hysterics when he can’t find his bones.

Photo submitted by: Anon

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Gallery: Abby 2 (Abz)

Thursday, July 24th, 2014

Name: Abby (Abz)
Location: Unknown

Abz the Cat

Sometimes I get tired of the constant attacking and stretch out my whacking muscles.

What makes Abz so mean?

This is our mean as kitty, Abby. I’m not going to lie and tell you that she is the world’s meanest kitty, because she is. It is no lie.

She has a massive superiority complex and is totally arrogant. She constantly stares at you in disbelief thinking “My god, could a being get any dumber than a human?!” When not staring at you in contempt, she is either demanding you worship her, feed her, or sometimes both.

Abby aka Abz

If you take my photo, I will attack you.

If approached too suddenly, Abby will attack you. If you are too loud around her, she will attack you. If you pat her incorrectly, she will attack you. In fact, there’s not a great deal you can do that won’t result in a attack except stay away from her.

When she catches things, she throws them against walls and furniture until they die. Then she attacks you. I have a 3-inch scar on my abdomen, not from a cute little kitty scratch, but a vile laceration delivered with precision that bled profusely.

Nevertheless, she is adored by us.

Photos submitted by: Randall

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Gallery: Abbey

Thursday, July 24th, 2014
Name: Abbey
Location: NY

Are there other terms besides mine IN this world? I think not...I'm a cat!

What makes Abbey so mean?

We call her our nasty New Yorker kitty. I picked her up at a local street fair in Upstate New York eight years ago. She was the last kitten in a cardboard box. No one wanted her, so I carried her home. She was tiny, but that didn’t keep her from beating up my Mom’s three other cats when I got her there. 

She was infested with fleas, worms, and the worst case of ear mites our vet had ever seen! Anyway, she is not to be messed with. She will come and love you on her terms, but if you pet her too long, she will swat or bite you! She really hates to be touched at all, and just forget about picking her up! She’s a very verbal meankitty, and has lots of ways of telling people to piss off.

Abbey particularly hates other cats. She TOLERATES our two male kitties because they are bigger than she is. If they come too close, WHAM! she smacks them! We also have two Great Pyrenees dogs who each weigh about 90 pounds. She hates them too. If they come too close when they walk by, she sinks her teeth into their fur with a vengeance.

Photo submitted by: Emily

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Gallery: Abbe

Thursday, July 24th, 2014

Name: Abbe
Location: Unknown

Abbe Loaf

Abbe Loaf? I'm gonna LOAF you, human, into mincemeat.

What makes Abbe so mean?

Abbe is a demoness (she even wears a little pewter tag that reads, “Demon Kitty”), but she has a valid excuse. She is a rescue cat, who was rescued from a very abusive situation. She was placed in three different foster homes, and returned because she was so vicious that the foster care staff couldn’t do a thing with her. The staff was at wit’s end but really really wanted to give her every extra chance they could, since they felt so sorry for her after all she’d been through. Still, she was within a few days of being put to sleep when my housemate saw her in Petco, was told her story, and took pity on her. Not that Abbe wants anybody’s stinkin’ pity. It took him a long time to win her over, but he is even more stubborn than she is. She made us all work very hard to earn positions on her household staff.

She is The Queen, and never lets anyone forget it. She rules all human and animal family members with an iron paw. 

Photo submitted by: Rilla

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Gallery: Abby

Thursday, July 24th, 2014

Name: Abby
Location: NY House of Cats

Abby from New York

Actually human flesh tastes horrible. I'd rather eat the generic Special Kitty than monkey fingers!

What makes Abby so mean?

This is Abby. Abby loves the taste of human flesh. She also leaves little brown presents for her owners to stroll through. She and the rest are still PO’d at us because we no longer can afford canned cat food. (They were going through 40 cans a week!!! Twenty bucks a week is too much — they eat better than I do!)

Since I decided the cats can make a few sacrifices for me, Abby has pretty much decided I am on her S list. S standing for “shred”.

Photo submitted by: Connie

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Gallery: Musspuss

Wednesday, July 23rd, 2014

Name: MussPuss
Location: New Zealand

Musspuss is a meankitty

Mmmmm, I love snacking on humans! High in fiber, low in hairballs, and the screaming is music to my ears.

What makes MussPuss so mean?

She’s one of those cats who looks all fluffy and cuddly but is really Satan on four legs. No ankle is safe when she is around. She’s especially bad when she’s been given fresh red meat for dinner.

As you can see by the picture she is in the middle of making a meal out of my hand.

Submitted by: Christy W.

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