Posts Tagged ‘barf’

Advice: Places to Puke

Saturday, July 26th, 2014

Dear Meankitty,

Have you ever thrown up on a tile floor, covered it with a piece of newspaper and watched as your slaves slip and fall? Do it in the early in the morning before your slave gets the hot brown stink water and position it so he has to step on it to get to the light switch. After he slips–run! Go in the bathroom, stretch out on the towels you pulled down from the rack and look innocent. Good fun!

Signed,
Teevors, ZsaZsa, Chee, the Lady Di and Jake

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Dear Manycats,

Sounds like you could be writing advice on this site! Those of you who are visiting here looking for SOHC tips to annoy your humans, that’s a good one.

Sincerely,
Meankitty

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Gallery: Alfie (2)

Sunday, January 15th, 2012

Name: Alfie
Location: Newcastle Upon Tyne, UK

Alfie

Now you see me...now you don't. Oh, wait, you probably do see me, but your eyes are blurred by tears of pain.

What makes Alfie so mean?

Alfie the Bengal came into our lives 2 years ago as an 8 month old because his previous human could not cope with his behavioural problems. Thinking she was exaggerating (although the fact that she gave her pedigreed kitten away complete with food, cat bed and toys should have been a clue) we took him back to our home.

It has never been the same since. He has destroyed calendars, ornaments, books, maps, plants, and a cooker guarantee. He likes to pull the wicks out of candles. He often attempts to break in to the fridge and the microwave, sometimes by pulling the kick boards out from under the kitchen units, other times by just clawing the appliances. I have had to buy 7 (count ‘em) new white bath mats because he seems to prefer to use these than a litter tray. Even though he goes outside too.

If we do not give him attention when he demands it, he mooches around until he finds something to do which he knows is naughty. Clawing the furniture, biting a plant and crawling up the chimney are all part of his repertoire.

Alfie

Did you get me a new white fuzzy litter box at the store today? Hm? Why you insist on calling it a "bath mat" I have no idea.

He is a fighter – if there is any cat fight in the street, it is a certainty that he is involved. He hones his skills with regular surprise attacks on his human. On top of these utterly charming behaviours, he also has flatulence. But Alfie “Mini the Mooch Pepe the Poo” (to give him his full name) WE LOVE YOU!!

Photo submitted by: Chris and Jo

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