La la la la la la la!

What makes Madalyn so mean?

Don’t let her modest size fool you – this is two hundred pounds of repressed dictator concealed in a five and a half pound kitty exterior. She was born and raised in Hawaii, and you’d think the environment would mellow her out, but no, she’s a tyrant in paradise. One of four cats in residence. Very particular about the rules of the house. Hers. Very specific about the kitty-attention-provision schedule. Hers. This is a picture of her explaining the fact that all is hers to the new recruits.

Photo submitted by: Fritz

Don't forget that itchy spot on my butt, human! Last time I had to scratch it myself.

What makes Pancetta so mean?

Here is photo of my mean cat who is named Pancetta or Panny for short. In this photo she is having a nice moment and is forgetting to be mean, because nothing beats a good vacuuming. When she is not getting vacuumed she bites ankles and knocks items off of tables and shelves.

Photo submitted by: Teal

On the day Sue was born...the cats all gathered round...and they gazed in wild wonder...at the treat they had found....the head cat spoke up!...she said, let this one be owned!...she could tell right away....Sue'd taste good to the bone. Sink your teeth to the bone!

What makes Fluffy so mean?

On the day I was born
the techs all gathered ’round
and they gazed in wild wonder
at the joy they had found

The head vet spoke up
She said, “Leave this one alone.”
She could tell right away
I was bad to the bone!

Bad to the bone
Bad to the bone
ba ba ba ba ba ba bad
ba ba ba ba ba ba bad

Bad to the bone

This cat actually put me in the Emergency room. He had bitten me so bad that my hand swelled up to the size of a baseball glove. I needed to receive 1 1/2 grams of Rocephin a very powerful antibiotic. All because I looked at another cat, hahahha.

Submitted by: Sue

From what I hear, Olddave was a dog lover. Bring on the new generation! Bring on the Newdave!

What makes Newdave so mean?

Perhaps it all began when he realized that he was replacing another cat, but this kitty truly knows how to tear it up. Besides fighting with all of my other four cats, Newdave also has a wide vocabulary of tiger-like growls the extent of which I never imagined a housecat could produce. One of Newdave’s favorite mean activities is sitting on my chest while I am sleeping while gashing my face with his monster claws.

Submitted by: Nell

Go to www.meankitty.com or I'll bite you. Hell, I'll bite you anyway!

What makes Fluffy so mean?

Fluffy is a terror. She objects to many, many things. Computer use. People. Appendages.

OBJECTION! And you can't overrule.

Dogs. Cheap catfood. Dirty catboxes. Reality TV. Other cats. Toilet paper. Water. Birds. Squirrels. Carpets and couches. Life.

Submitted by: Anon

One guess what I'm doing in this photo... Heh heh heh.

What makes Fluffy so mean?

Don’t let the sappy name fool you. Fluffy’s harmless with humans, but most other kitties–watch out! He steals my other cat’s food (in addition to eating his own) and will actually shove Max (the nice kitty) out of the way to get to it. He’s also a chaser. My late cat Bosco took to living in the basement to avoid him chasing her and batting at her with his paws. Amazingly enough, I still adore him.

Submitted by: Denise

Hi, I'm Mags. I may be white. I may be black. I may have a split personality. I may be mean. I may be nice. Are you confused yet?

What makes Mags so mean?

He’s a boxer.

Meankitty says: So what? How does this prove he is mean? For all we know ‘boxer’ could mean ‘likes to get in boxes’. Sissy.

Submitted by: Anon

Me and my calico partner--just call us the Wonder Twins. Shape of...A HELLCAT!

What makes Minifluff so mean?

This is Minifluff. I found her yowling pitifully in a snow bank next to my porch one night. She was only a few weeks old, and my soft heart forbade me to leave her in the cold. I should have known she would bring nothing but trouble even then, as she hissed, spat, and yowled at me, thwarting my every attempt to shoo her into a box. Finally I tossed a jacket over her and brought the whole, noisy bundle into the house. An hour and a can of cat food later, she decided that I wasn’t planning to eat her.

Since then, she has made it her personal goal to cause as much bodily harm to her loving humans as possible. When she isn’t climbing the walls or curtains, she’s biting ankles. She quite literally flies from the end of the hall to behind the couch and back again in an unending game of tag with her furry calico partner in crime. I am usually an obstacle that comes between the cats and the back of the couch, and I find myself bleeding quite often. Anything that comes near her will cause her eyes to gleam maniacally and warrant a good swat or two.

The phrase that is most often directed at her is, “You’re crazed, Minifluff!”

Submitted by: Denise

Am I in the mood for petting? Not in the mood? Come on, take a chance!

What makes Medea so mean?

Around the same time that Mean Kitty and Big D had an Interloper (and Rats) problem, Magick, Mystick and Merlin had their own interloper problem. But this interloper looked more like an Alien and the inevitable offspring were Space Monkeys. At first the interloper was called The Alien. All of the Monkeys found their own Slaves before X-mas 2005, but somehow The Alien remained! So this is the story of Medea–aka The Alien, Lightbulbs, and Chub-chubs (she came back from a stay at the vets all ‘fixed’ but soon looked like she swallowed an entire loaf of bread whole.)

Medea is naturally a growler and biter–as a lot of Orientals are–we think she is a Bombay–but the constant threat of death that looms over her head living with Magick and especially Mystick has left her a tad demented. Medea despises the duster. If the duster is left in the library it sounds like the bowels of Hell in there.

What the slaves don't know is the feather duster springs to life behind their backs and attempts to open the seal to the 8th level of Hades. I am MEDEA, the ALIEN DEMON HUNTER!

Mystick has to be locked away in another room for Medea to see the light of day in the other parts of the house, and even then it is a constant hissing and growling fest. Medea puts up with Sam the dog since Sam is an 80 pound Akita used for hunting bear. Of course this does not help Medea’s paranoia, though Sam loves cats and would never hurt them on purpose.

Once Medea and Myssi met face-to-face, it turned into a screaming, fur-flying cat rumble that left Medea with a split ear. Medea holds grudges. If you pet her too long or in the wrong spot or she is just not in the mood (frequently the case), she will attack you, even if it takes hours to set up the ambush. Ankles and elbows–where the skin is thinner and rips more easily on Slaves–are her preferred targets. Always accompanied with vicious loud growls, huffing and puffing, and hissing that is enough to give you a heart-attack before she even touches you! Sometimes Medea will attack just because you are talking to her. At night when the Slaves go in the library to turn out her light and make sure she has food and water, she grabs their ankles in the dark, sinks her fangs into the top of their feet, and claws up the shin while howling like a she-demon.

10/09 Update: Medea still lives in the library but sneaks out quite a bit when everyone else is napping.

Magick’s Page / Mystick’s Page / Merlin’s Page / Medea’s Page / House of M Holiday Update

Submitted by: Ravyn

The crows actually carry my messages to my followers in the wild as we gear up to the day we take over the world.

What makes Magick so mean?

Magick is an almost 8-yr old Norwegian Forest Cat, weighing in at around 30 pounds–HA! YOU try to get him on a scale! He has a long double coat like Wegies do, so he gets ‘sensory overload’ and does not like to be touched unless it is HIS idea. He is a ‘police’ cat and must patrol the perimeters and open all closed doors continually–all night long. He is very smart and since I made the mistake of showing him how to latch the screen door I now have to use the dog leash to keep it closed.

He is very curious and will come running when say ‘LOOK!’ and he cackles at birdies, responding with different sounds for different birds. His favorite are crows, maybe because they are black like him. I tell everyone his Native American name is ‘Talks to Crows’ because he will get all spazzy and carry on a one-sided conversation when he sees a crow. He chases poor Merlin, our white Odd-Eye, and thumps him hard with his massive paws whenever he is upset for any reason–most of the time Merlin has nothing to do with it and just innocently walks by.

If he is really mad, he will stalk you; when he starts to chew on the side of his mouth, he is ready to lose it and needs to be ‘papoosed’ (with a beach towel!) and catnipped or he will tear you up. He has a rage problem. I don’t know why; he has always had a happy home.

Magick’s Page / Mystick’s Page / Merlin’s Page / Medea’s Page / House of M Holiday Update

Submitted by: Ravyn [A long-time Meankitty visitor!]