Archive for the ‘Cats’ Category

Gallery: Tango (2)

Tuesday, April 15th, 2014

Name: Tango
Location: UK

Tango is mean

There's nothing like the smell of fresh napalm in the morning. Except maybe a field of burning catnip.

What makes Tango so mean?

I am writing this letter as Tango (my cat who is brother to satan) would love to be on your website. Tango is 5 years old and throughout those 5 years it has felt like I have lived in hell! He has a whole grave yard to his name, he has killed that many animals. I’ve had rats, many birds and even my next door neighbour’s pet. He doesn’t back down at animals his own size; he has attacked me a countless amount of times. The worst was one night when I shut him in the bathroom by accident. When I finally came to his rescue, he sprang out at me, scratching my face numerous times and leaving numerous scars.

Photo submitted by: Matt

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Gallery: Bandit and Kitters

Tuesday, April 8th, 2014

Name: Bandit & Kitters
Location: Elkhart, IN

Bandit and Kitters

Can't have a social life with stupid humans around. Play with the dog, don't consort with strays...sheesh!

What makes B & K so mean?

Bandit is the Snowshoe Siamese and Kitters is the black & white cat. What makes them so mean…..Laddy Dog. Laddy loves to play with the kitties. Bandit doesn’t like Laddy, and Kitters, like most cats, wants to play on his own time.

Kitters will attack anything that moves under a blanket, not to mention Crouching Tiger under the bed. He hides under the bed and attacks any and all unsuspecting feet and legs.

Bandit is usually a lover, except for when she’s in heat and sneaks outdoors. One time while in heat she snuck out and hid in the bushes with two boyz. When I tried to get her she growled like a ferocious jungle cat. She would like to have bit my fingers off, so she got sprayed with the garden hose. And that’s what makes my kitties so mean!

Photo submitted by: Pam

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Gallery: Bandit (3)

Monday, April 7th, 2014

Name: Bandit (3)
Location: Bay of Plenty, New Zealand

Bandit is not that mean

I smell dead people.

What makes Bandit so mean?

Bandit is quite an exceptional cat. He comes to you when you whistle, is not afraid of water, and loves to perform tricks in front of people. I sometimes wonder if he even thinks he’s a cat at all!

[Meankitty's note: Man, this cat is so obviously not "mean" or otherwise deserving of Gallery status, but it's a great pic, huh? I was feeling generous today.]

Photo submitted by: Tony

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Gallery: Bandit (2)

Sunday, April 6th, 2014

Name: Bandit
Location: Wisconsin

Bandit is Dracula Kitty

I was a termite in my former life before I achieved the highest pinnacle one can hope for. That would be CAT.

What makes Bandit so mean?

“His eyes were positively blazing. The red light in them was lurid, as if the flames of hellfire blazed behind them….” -Dracula, by Bram Stoker.

This is Bandit. He, as you can see, is possessed. Some say by a French demon (hence the goatee). The adorable, chuckle-inducing exterior of this cat hides an inner master of destruction and chaos. The first signs of it were when he was a wee little thing. In the dark of the night, he would scrape my face raw with his tongue, waking me from a sound sleep. I would turn my face away and he would go around and keep scraping. So I would push him away with my hand, which he chewed on. Enthusiastically. This would happen over and over and over every night.

I believe this behavior is tied to one of his others: he eats fabric. Bandit’s favorite dietary delicacies are wool, cotton, fleece and OAK!!!! Yes, he actually chewed on a piece of solid oak furniture and the marks are there to this day. One time, I was wearing a pair of Alpaca socks at home and he started chewing on them….while I was still wearing them! This possessed feline is the most destructive creature known to man – he has destroyed towels, blankets, sheets, countless socks, shirts, shorts, jeans. For fun, he shreds corrugated cardboard boxes. It is my lot in life to provide a shelter complete with chew toys for this creature, but on occasion, the demon will be quiescent and the sweet lovey baby will snuggle with me and (almost) make me forget I want to file his teeth.

Photo submitted by: Barb

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Gallery: Bandit

Saturday, April 5th, 2014

Name: Bandit
Location: Unknown

Bandit is a giant kitty

Everything I ask for? Are you kidding? I ask to be left alone, and look what pictures they take!

What makes Bandit so mean?

Bandit is a very evil kitty. Even though My boyfriend and I give him everything he asks for and love on him all the time, Bandit still feels the need to chew up my make up brushes, knock my books and papers off my desk, and use the carpet as a scratching post. Bandit’s favorite playtime activities include placing his paw in my drinking glass, pulling it over, and spilling liquid all over the table and floor, and pouncing as hard as he can in my boyfriend’s lap. At night Bandit waits for me to fall asleep then paws at my eyes. Every morning he starts meowing and pawing at my face approximately an hour before the alarm goes off.

Photo submitted by: Sarah

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Gallery: Woozles

Friday, April 4th, 2014

Name: Woozles
Location: Unknown

Woozles is a meankitty

Hey…you gonna eat that or can I have it?

What makes Woozles so mean?

This is Woozles….alias ‘The Scourge of Shelley’, ‘Big Fat’ or just plain ‘Big Puss’ He was a stray who attached himself to us because we offered him a morsel of cheese. He is the scourge of the neighborhood – even grabbing us with his paw as we walk past him (now we know why he was dumped!) but as the picture shows he does a good job on the rat front.

Despite us finding the tattoo in his ear that indicates he is neutered, he has been spotted mounting poor innocent female cats and is extremely territorial…which is why our other cat spends most of her time up on the roof of our house, out of reach of the jumping capabilities of ‘Big Fat’. He is one big nasty cat!

Photo submitted by: Xavier

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Gallery: Soeren

Monday, March 31st, 2014

Name: Soeren
Location: Scandinavia

Soeren is a meankitty

Dress me in a stupid hat and take my picture, will you? You shall pay, human. You shall pay.

What makes Soeren so mean?

Soeren is a Scandinavian Zombie cat who bites on everyone and everything. On this picture he has just finished off Santa Claus (wearing his cap as evidence). What can we do about him?

Meankitty says: I think he would not be so mad if you didn’t put hats on him. Also, if you gave him his own can of sardines every day…that might help.

Submitted by: Bjorn and Therese

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Gallery: Murphey

Sunday, March 30th, 2014

Name: Murphey
Location: Arizona

Murphey is a meankitty

If they're dumb enough not to notice me behind TRANSPARENT curtains, they deserve to get clawed up.

What makes Murphey so mean?

Murphey’s mother (Fluffy) was a stray that my family ended up taking in, and then our tabby Eddie knocked her up and she had five kittens. I got to keep Murphey.

He was very sweet to me when he was a baby. He used to sleep in my hair every night. He was extremely obnoxious to everyone else, though, and used to run all the way from my room into my mother’s room and claw his way up one side of the curtains on her window and down the other. I knew every time he did it because I would hear her shriek “Murphey!” at the top of her lungs, and then she would yell at me to come get my demon cat and put him outside. He also used to lie in wait in my closet behind my see-through curtains for my mom, my sister, or my mom’s fat pug Kiwi to walk by, whereupon he would jump out and attack them. Oh, and he would bite anyone who tried to pet him (except for me, of course). He even peed on my mother’s bed twice. One summer he got into a fight with his mom, Fluffy, in our backyard and pushed her into the pool.

Murphey is a wet meankitty

FYI, pushing ME into the pool after I was just trying to teach the old lady to swim is NOT GOOD. Wait and see what happens on your bed NOW, human.

Unfortunately, a couple of months ago he got very sick and passed on, and I miss him and think of him every single day. But I know that he’s having fun terrorizing everyone up there in kitty-heaven. I love you, Murph!!!

Submitted by: Lexie

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Gallery: Leela

Saturday, March 29th, 2014

Name: Leela
Location: Florida

Leela is a meankitty

Does this look like the face of a kitty who'd do all those naughty things? Yeah? OK FINE!

What makes Leela so mean?

Leela is the latest kitty addition to our household. My husband snatched her from underneath the building where he works wjere several feral cats were living. Needless to say, not one of them was fixed. Leela was one of the litters that was birthed in April 2000.

Leela had an eye infection, and one eye was sort of shut, so we had to take her to the vet before we could bring her home. We didn’t have a name for her, but since we love “futurama”, we named our temporarily one eyed cat “Leela” after the show’s one eyed alien ship captain.

Anyway, Leela is *the* meankitty of the Royal household. She can sometimes be good, but most of the time she is very, very bad.

Some of Leela’s likes:

-toilet paper (she loves to grab it and run down the hallway, as it streams behind her)

-paper towels (she jumps on the kitchen counter and pulls them down; see toilet paper, above)

-jumping on the dining room table and leaving little litter particles everywhere. yum!

-jumping on mommy and in the bathroom sink while mom does her makeup and hair

-standing below the ice dispenser on the fridge, watching and waiting for falling objects

-her rhino beanie baby, which she plays fetch with

-any kind of fabric that hangs down, ex. curtains, sewing fabric, tablecloths, dishtowels

-running around on the top of the comforter, chasing after feet and hands, just as her mom and dad are trying to freaking sleep….

Leela is a meankitty

If you'd get out of the way, I've got some poopy litter between my paw pads I need to distribute on the table...

She can really be a little beast sometimes, because she’s got so much energy, and she’s so defiant. but we love her. I particularly love when she jumps on me right out of the shower…she rests her head on my shoulder and purrs, like she’s giving me a kitty hug *sigh*. Too bad she can’t be that way all the time!

Submitted by: Tricia Royal

Meankitty’s Note: Leela was one of the VERY FIRST KITTIES to ever be in Meankitty’s Gallery. YAY LEELA!

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Gallery: Waldo

Thursday, March 27th, 2014

Name: Waldo
Location: His Department

Waldo is right here

Whaddya mean, where's Waldo? I'm right here, ya ijjit!

What makes Waldo so mean?

Waldo is a mean kitty because he knocks stuff down, wakes me up too early, chews his sister’s whiskers, howls all the time, and just wrecks everything.

Photo submitted by: Elizabeth

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