Archive for June, 2015

Gallery: Nell

Wednesday, June 17th, 2015

Name: Nell
Location: House of Antique Video Games

Nell is mean

I hate that stupid dog on there! He's such a norp.

What makes Nell so mean?

Nell isn’t mean so much as she is feisty. She likes to be in the middle of anything I am doing even when it really messes up what I am doing. Here I am in my room trying to play old-style Nintendo — does anybody remember Duck Hunt? — and Nell is blocking my view. But I think she’s having more fun than I am. Stupid game.

Photo submitted by: Oliver


Gallery: Indie

Tuesday, June 16th, 2015

Name: Indie
Location: Charleston, SC

Indie is mean

I'll let you brush me if you let me "brush" you first.

What makes Indie so mean?

This is my mean kitty, Indie. She likes to bite; if you are petting her the wrong way or at the wrong time, beware, and she is especially unfond of being brushed. She gets in this sink (my husband’s, of course) and growls if you try to get her to move.

Photo submitted by: Jane


Gallery: Butterball

Monday, June 15th, 2015

Name: Butterball
Location: New Orleans

Butterball is mean

Aren't you glad I bit you in the OLD apartment instead of the NEW one with the white carpet?? No, the white carpet gets the hairball and weewee special.

What makes Butterball so mean?

This is Butterball, my mean kitty. He never learned to trust humans, but is a part of the family, anyway. Butty is glued to the hip of his mommy, Peaches, every day. He loves getting treats and might even take it from my hand if he’s feeling especially brave. The only way I can pet him is if he’s in a spot where he feels safe, and even then, I can just stroke him gently and carefully. He could change his mind at any second, tho he’s never bitten me for petting him yet…

But forget moving day! We’re talking strong fishing net (have had to replace it twice already) and long oven mitts for safety. I made the mistake of not wearing any. Luckily, my friend had some on. My friend got the net over Butty and I helped slide him over to the cage. During the process, Butty twisted around and bit my wrist thru the net….right thru from top to bottom! It wasn’t until he was finally secured in the cage that I dealt with my injury, dripping blood everywhere. Thank goodness he’s an inside cat and doesn’t have rabies.

Photo submitted by: Wendy


Advice: How Many Kitties?

Saturday, June 13th, 2015

Dear Meankitty,

In your omnipotent feline wisdom, I am hoping you can help me solve a mystery. I am just a simple pink kitty slave who used to be owned by one meankitty named Elvis. Pretty soon I was owned by three meankitties. Now I am owned by five meankitties, and I think they are planning to move another one in next month.

What exactly are these cats doing to me while I sleep that makes me continue to enslave myself to more and more of them? When will this end? Will this end? Are kitties highly skilled at slave hypnotism?



Dear Pinkie,

They’ll top out at 5 or 6. They won’t want to share their food, their catboxes, and their petting time that much unless you live on a farm or something.

As for admitting what the cats do when you’re sleeping, my vow as a member of SOHC prevents me from revealing that information.



Gallery: Skittles

Saturday, June 13th, 2015

Name: Skittles
Location: Boston

Skittles is a meankitty

Don't creep up behind me like that! It makes me feel paranoid.

What makes Skittles so mean?

This is Skittles, named as such because the moment we brought him home as a tiny kitten about seven years ago, he immediately ran to the couch, plopped onto his side, sunk his claws into the material and yanked himself along as though he were on a pulley. We called it “skittering.” (You thought he was named for the candy, huh?)

Skittles is mean

I'll give you five, all right...five sharp ones!

Skittles (a.k.a. Bubba and Sugar Butt) is a total Mama’s Boy and has to be where I am at all times. He sleeps with me, follows me from room to room, and throws a tantrum (by screaming at the top of his lungs, in his high-pitched baby-meow, non-stop) when he’s been shut out of a room into which I’ve gone. But Skittles isn’t all fat, blubbery love…oh, no. He’s a biter. I’m told (over and over again) that this is because I’ve spoiled him so much without discipline, but I know in my heart that, although his preternaturally large size speaks otherwise, Skittles still thinks he’s a kitten and doesn’t realize or understand that when he bites us playfully, it hurts!

Skittles is a meankitty

Going in for the big biteowski...

My boyfriend, Steve (with whom Skittles is quite competitive for my attentions), is learning just who’s the Alpha-male around here. You’d think after all this time, my two boys would get along, but the sad truth of the matter is that Skittles doesn’t appreciate this extended intrusion of such an interloper in his life.

Photo submitted by: Heather


Gallery: Zeus (2)

Friday, June 12th, 2015

Name: Zeus (2)
Location: New York

Zeus is a meankitty

My house is not a kitty litter box. But yes, I do want to go into the kitty litter box.

What makes Zeus so mean?

* This cat owns one of Typing Slave’s readers

Here is Zeus aka THE BASTARD. He was at the No Kill Shelter for 4 years, only being let out of his “house” for less than 30 minutes a day since he would wack the crap out of the other cats. He would race around and grumble, growl and complain when told to get back in his “house”. He was also noted for smacking and wacking the workers as well and for having a very bad attitude.

When my sister told me about his “unique” personality, how beautiful he was and how he had very expressive/intelligent eyes, I was sure we could handle him and he wouldn’t have to be in the cage all the time. So she brought him home at Christmas time in 2006.

The first week he was wacking everyone right and left while letting out this horrible yowl. Once the other cats learned to give Zeus his space and we refused to back down from his attitude, he settled in for the most part. We can give him hugs, kisses, pets and some very quick cuddles if we have his payment of crunchies right on hand.

If he acts up while walking across the room smacking and grumbling we suggest he go eat his crunchies or go sit on the hope chest and look out the window. If he persists we whip out the big guns: “YOU WANT TO GO IN YOUR HOUSE??”

Submitted by: Michelle


Gallery: Cooter

Thursday, June 11th, 2015

Name: Cooter
Location: Tampa, FL

Cooter is a meankitty

This is me waiting to scratch you till I'm satisfied.

What makes Cooter so mean?

Cooter, who was found on the street at probably only a month or two of life, was a scavenger who loved to draw blood for fun. He would follow you around waiting for you to stop and then go for the kill. If you weren’t wearing pants or sleeves he would scratch and bite until he was satisfied or you chase him off. The stairs were his favorite, nipping at your feet the whole way up and down. So the bathroom became his home until slowly he gave up his predator-like behavior.

Cooter is a mean sink kitty

This is me daring you to turn on the sink...

Now he has settled into a nice fat spoiled house cat.

Photo submitted by: Jared


Gallery: Baby Cat

Wednesday, June 10th, 2015

Name: Baby Cat
Location: Unknown

Baby Cat is mean

If I were a movie star, do you think I'd bother attacking anyone? I'd have my agent do it!

What makes Baby Cat so mean?

This is Baby Cat. She is a Black and White tuxedo type, with the “movie star” attitude to match. She likes to jump out at people, dogs, shadows, or just wind. She is always trying to attack something.

She is rotten to the core! I might need protection from another cat down the road.

Photo submitted by: Gena


Gallery: Rusty Rex

Tuesday, June 9th, 2015

Name: Rusty Rex
Location: Oklahoma City

Rusty is a meankitty

Ohhh, it's worth being locked in the bathroom every time. You should see the slaves come running! Now if only I could convince the other cats to work in tandem with me...but no, they're sissies. So I eat their food.

What makes Rusty so mean?

Now Rusty is one “MEAN” kitty! He is the orange headed step child. We got him from a neighbor. Little did we know he was a meankitty until later.

He loves to attack or bother flea lions, and he will not leave the birds alone. We have several cages of parakeets and he just loves to hear them scream for help at 3:00 AM so the whole household wakes up.

Just as I lie back down after calming the birds, he runs down the stairs and gets on the cages again, making sure I get no sleep. At that point he gets locked in the bathroom for the rest of the night and the next day he always takes his frustrations out on the other cats, right up to the point of taking their food right out of their mouths.

Photo submitted by: Sleepless in Oklahoma


Gallery: Bunky

Friday, June 5th, 2015

Name: Bunky
Location: San Francisco

Bunky is a meankitty

Feed me or you're kissing the floor, Food Slave.

What makes Bunky so mean?

Bunky can be nice kitty and he can be a mean, snotty kitty when he’s in a bad mood. For instance, he loves to sleep right next to me. If I move and wake him up, he’ll hiss and scratch! He’s very demanding about dinner and will nearly trip me if I don’t feed him right away when I get home from work.

Photo submitted by: Martha