Archive for August, 2010

Letters: I Love You

Tuesday, August 31st, 2010

My Dearest Darling Meankitty,

I hope this note finds you well. There was so much I wanted to say in my last post but couldn’t. The feelings were too overwhelming. I have pined and longed for you since I first discovered your site almost ten years ago. Over the years I have come to accept the fact that we will never be together in this life. I use to curse life and my very existance for this fact. But that is no longer the case. Upon seeing your new site and that absolutely enchanting close-up of you on the top of the screen I can now say that I can/will eventaully die a happy and fullfilled cat.

With My Undying Love,
Thomas. (aka Tom)

PS: While I don’t know where you live I spend every night imaging how glorious it would be to sernade you. Do you think about me as much as I think about you? I wish we could get married and have kittens together!

***

Dear Tom,

I’m fixed. Sorry, dude.

Sincerely,
Meankitty

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Gallery: Lucy (2)

Tuesday, August 31st, 2010

Name: Lucy (2)
Location: MA

Lucy started out mean

The face attacks are not at all spontaneous, you understand. It's not my fault if the humans cannot read my warning signs.

What makes Lucy so mean?

Lucy is only 6 months old (at the time of this photo) but a holy terror! She is ridiculously cute and thus gets away with everything. Oh, where to start? She will use your pant leg as a scratching post, eats the expensive plastic flower arrangement on the dining room table, unravels entire rolls of toilet paper (which must be hidden from her), cannot resist entering any closet or cabinet that is opened and then gets stuck in them, meows as if she is dying whenever we feed her wet food (she LOVES it).

My personal favorite mean behavior: spontaneously attacking faces. Lovely, adorable, terrifying little kitten she is.

Photo submitted by: Anne, Mario and Christina

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Gallery: Lucy

Tuesday, August 31st, 2010

Name: Lucy
Location: Unknown

Lucy is majorly mean

It's not the mantitty, but it'll do.

What makes Lucy so mean?

Lucy is a mean kitty because she is so unpredictable. One moment, she’ll be snuggly and purring and the next, Satan takes over. She pounces on hands, feet, arms, legs, whatever moves and is easily accessible and uses every weapon she has (teeth, front claws, back claws, sneakiness) to attack. Surprisingly, she has never drawn blood, so she can’t be all that vicious, right?

She’s also literally ‘quick as a cat.’ She can jump at you from behind the couch or out of her kitty house in a matter of milliseconds. Basically, she’s crazy. She has even been known to attack her human daddy’s nipples while he was sleeping in order to wake him up/get attention. This was very humorous to her human mommy, but daddy was not so thrilled. She stopped that, but she’s still psycho. We love her for all of her personalities, no matter how evil they can be.

Photo submitted by: Kimberly

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Links: FaceBooooook

Monday, August 30th, 2010

My Typing Slave made me a page on Facebook for you to like: 

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Meankitty/155752787773679

Looks like we can get the “notes” area to duplicate the RSS here but this will still be the HOTBED of MEANNESS! Which doesn’t mean you shouldn’t like me over on Facebook.

Toodles and Whiskers!

Meankitty

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Letters: How Are You?

Monday, August 30th, 2010

Dear Meankitty,

Hi, it’s me. Tom. Your biggest fan. Did I mention I was your biggest fan? How are you doing today? Don’t you feel your life is lacking a special someone these days? Are you sure there’s nothing I can do for you to make your life complete?

Sincerely,
Tom

***

Dear Tom,

I’m good, thanks! Although I always like to get more entries for my Gallery. That always makes my day.

Sincerely,
Meankitty

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Gallery: Baby (3)

Monday, August 30th, 2010

Name: Baby (3)
Location: High Up

Baby is a meankitty

You know, my tail is better than a dryer sheet for removing static. Ha ha ha! Not really, it just makes things worse. But it sure is funny.

What makes Baby so mean?

My mean kitty is named Baby. She is two years old.

When I get on the computer she will jump up on it and hang her tail down across the screen. When I ask her to move it she just wags it back and forth. When I move it she turns around and scratches my hand, or grabs my hand and bites it, then she puts her paw down across the screen.

Baby sleeps in my bathroom sink and bites me when I try to get her out. When I turn on the water she bites at it but stays in the sink.

When I walk across the floor she runs in front of me, jumps up, flips, and lunges at me when I pass her.

Photo submitted by: Della

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Advice: Hissing and Spitting

Sunday, August 29th, 2010

Dear Meankitty,

My Sir Thomas gained a little sister a year and a half ago. He went from being a loving, very cuddly boy to a nasty tempered demon. To this day most of the time he spits and hisses at me, and he sprays anything and everything several times over. Luckily his spray has very little odor. But he seems to be obsessive-compulsive about it. I want my mild-tempered, loving, non-spraying cat back. Is there any way I can help him to like me again?

Signed,
Sandy

***

Dear Sandy,

Who wants a mild-tempered kitty? What would life be without hissing, spitting, biting and the like? For the spraying, see my advice to Rommina. You could also try feeding Sir Thomas and Little Sister lots of tuna. Just be sure to give plenty to both of them. When dirty little D (he WAS little then…) came into my house, I was pretty irritated for a while, but my Human Typing Slave gave me tuna and treats in a special location away from gnoshing D so the little bugger couldn’t raid my stash. That helped.

Sincerely,
Meankitty

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Advice: Nacho Problem

Saturday, August 28th, 2010

Dear Meankitty,

My cat Nacho, is the cutest cat in the world. He loves to play & cuddle and has been really good to me. He is the first cat I have ever owned. Lately, I have noticed that he has been peeing in one of the corners of my living room & I can’t figure out why or how to make him stop that. Please help!!

Signed,
Rommina

***

Dear Rommina,

He might be mad because you gave him a name like Nacho. You could try putting an extra cat pan in the corner of your living room or spraying the area with Feliway or No-Go, products available from Drs. Foster and Smith or Petsmart. Or you could just learn to appreciate the fine kitty cologne that Nacho is sharing with you.

Sincerely,
Meankitty

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Advice: Multiple Cats, Another View

Friday, August 27th, 2010

Dear Meankitty,

My family and I have, so far, rescued 13 cats (with kittens). We are currently, slowly and carefully, rescuing 2 more moms with their 4 (total) kittens. Is there such a thing as too many? We are pretty sure that one of the original mama cats was the queen of a colony in our area. We believe she is sending messages to all of our subsequent rescuees. Any advice would be most welcome.

Signed,
Many Cats

***

Dear Many Cats,

Lots of cats can be lots of party; however, you shouldn’t have more than you can spoil. It also depends on how big your house and yard and pocketbook are. Of course, if riding the halls on a mewing wave of felines is your thing, get some more! “Cat Lady” is an honorable human designation in the SOHC world.

Sincerely,
Meankitty

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Letters: Insults and Injuries

Thursday, August 26th, 2010

Dearest Meankitty,

How dare somebody on the internet offer you insult! You just say the word and I will put a scratch out on them. Heck, I will even take care of the Big Scratch myself. C.Mathers is not LONG FOR THIS WORLD in one piece. Talk about pathetical. Doesn’t the lame human have anything better to do than insult people on the internet? C.Mathers obviously loves dogs and probably is a vegetarian. Also probably sleeps on a futon, or maybe the floor, and never reads the newspaper. I think I’m going to enlist the skunk mafia. You know what they can do to humans who get on their bad side. Good one, huh?

Your Biggest Fan,
Tom

***

Dear Tom,

There’s no need to defend me. There’s especially no need to involve the Stench Mob. I like all the emails I get from people who visited the site. Even dogs, because then we can mock them. “People who visited the site”, of course, does not include spammers or their evil spidery network programs.

Sincerely,
Meankitty

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